Oh Lord...

Forget the Mercedes Benz, like in the song! Just give me the strength to get through another experience of ignorance please... Today I had to attend a mediation session that was scheduled for an hour. I only got 15 minutes! This mediation session was set up by Lillie's father, who wants more contact with her. For reasons I do not wish to go into at this present time, I have declined his request. In fact I would like a Residency Order for Lillie. Again, I do not wish to go into why at this present time. Mediation is a process to satisfy the courts before either party opts to pursue taking the court route. It is a chance for us "to talk" in order to avoid taking the court route. Been alot of talking over the past few years. Nothing changes. As a parent, I feel heading for court is the only way forward now - Lillie might get heard then.. However, I am willing to give mediation a go - to satisfy the courts.

Mediation session one - well let's put it this way, I felt was not so good. Though, I have agreed to attending more and face-to-face with Lillie's father. Why? So, I can have the opportunity to be heard and be an advocate for Lillie. I won't give up! During those 15 mins, there was form filling and a very very slight discussion on why I was there. Like I said, because Lillie's father wants more contact with her. To cut this brief period in mediation time down, the subject of Lillie being home educated was broached upon. Lillie's father disagrees with Lillie being H.E and has badgered Lillie so many times with comments like, she should go to school. The peculiar thing is, he was all for H.E when the decision to not send Lillie to school came about four years ago. He's even commented on this blog during the early days of my starting one up.

I was of the belief, prior to attending today that mediators have to remain impartial. This was clarified at the start of the session. However, during the short discussion about H.E, a subject I can talk about for days on end, the mediator asked me some questions. Questions I found indicating a level of judgement towards me. Didn't think that was allowed. I was asked why I H.E Lillie. I gave a few reasons.

Then the conversation went like this - Mediator: How does Lillie feel about being Home Educated? Me: She loves it. Mediator: Has she ever been to school? Me: No. Mediator: So, she has nothing to compare Home Education to then. Me: Neither do most children who go to school.

Why try to get me to look at this differently? I think I have spent many an hour thinking about H.E compared to school. I went to school, I loved it. My grown up son went to school, he has never said he wished he hadn't. No one battered an eye lid. I never had H.E parents saying, my son and I had nothing to compare school to. So, why, oh why do some H.E parents get such ignorant lines of questioning. I shouldn't have to justify this line of questioning with an answer. Lillie loves her life at home with me just the way it is, thank you very much. I'm her mother. A mother who knows when she is happy, enthusiastic, tired, playful, wants to be left alone, wants to talk, wants to work on something she enjoys at her own pace and when she is unwell, sad or upset.
The day she tells me she would like to try school, then I will sit down with her and discuss it with her. She is not banned from school. It's a different way of life that I am offering her right now. She is in no danger of being exempt from society or achieving an academic background. Quite the opposite.

I will look forward to the next mediation session. I wonder if I will bite my lip so hard, where it draws blood again. All I know is, I know my child better than anyone right now. I know what she wants, and that is how it will remain, until she tells me otherwise.